questions to ask your highly sensitive child after school

What response do you typically get when asking your child, “How was your day at school?” If you usually get a one word answer like “Good,” “Okay”, or maybe just a grunt mildly resembling some sort of answer, you’re not alone! You can get a lot of insight into your child by learning about their school day, but it’s not always easy to get them talking. Timing and asking the right questions are key to getting them to open up about their successes and struggles throughout the day. Here are some tips on the best times to start a conversation and 35 questions to ask your highly sensitive child after school.

Tips on Timing

As tempting as it may be to ask your child a ton of questions after not seeing them all day, allow them time to decompress first! School is often a challenging place for highly sensitive kids, so their bodies and minds may be at max capacity. An innocent question right after school could lead to an angry response or meltdown.

Allowing your child to have some down time and a snack before asking them about their day will likely produce a much better response.

Casually bring up questions while playing or spending time together. Ask a question or two at dinner, or when driving somewhere with them. Be on the lookout for good opportunities to sit and connect with your child.

Bedtime is a great time to ask a few questions to your child. What kid doesn’t want to tell you more about their day if it means delaying their bedtime by a few minutes, right!?!

Questions to Ask your Highly Sensitive Child to get them Talking about their School Day

Who did you sit with at lunch
Who did you play with at recess
What did you play at recess
Did anyone get hurt today
Was anyone absent today
Did anything make you laugh?
Did anything make you feel worried or scared?
Was anyone unkind to you today?
Did anyone hurt your feelings?
What is something new you learned today?
What was the hardest rule to follow today?
If you could choose anyone in your class to sit next to tomorrow who would it be?
What was the best thing that happened at school today?
What was the worst thing that happened at school today?
Did anything frustrate you at school today?
What was your favorite thing you learned about today?
Can you show me something you learned today?
Did you help anyone today?
What do you like most about your teacher?
What do you like least about your teacher?
Did you see your brother/sister at school?
What was something that was hard or challenging for you today?
Did anyone get in trouble today?
What book did you or the teacher read to you today?
What are you looking forward to at school tomorrow?
Did any of your classmates do/say something funny?
Is there anything coming up at school that you are excited about?
Did you feel safe at school?
Did anyone do anything kind for you?
What is the most popular game at recess?
Did you eat all of your lunch?
What did you do at art, gym, music, etc. today?
What are you most proud of doing today?
How would you describe today in one word?
How would you rate your day on a scale of 1-10. How could it have been better?

Mix it up

Be sure to mix up how and when you ask your child questions to avoid the same responses each time. Get creative by passing around a bowl at dinnertime with questions for each person to pick out or have each family member share a high (good) and low (tough) part of their day. Some days you might have more luck than others. If they are not interested in talking on a certain day, don’t force it.

Be aware of your child’s response and tone. Do you find that certain days of the week are more difficult than others? Are you noticing any troubling patterns that need to be addressed with the school? Asking a few key questions at the right times each day will help you gain more insight into your highly sensitive child’s school experiences.

Have a question that you think should be on the list? Please share it in the comment section below, so that other parents can benefit from it. Thanks!