Setting intentions

I have been hearing a lot about setting intentions lately instead of resolutions and I absolutely love this idea! Resolutions put our focus more on specific goals and outcomes, leaving us feeling guilty or bad about ourselves when we don’t achieve them. Intentions focus more on mindset and the journey. They help you to identify broader habits that you want to adopt and encourage you to be mindful of them daily. In an effort to start your new year off right, I wanted to offer 10 intentions to set as a parent of a highly sensitive child (HSC).

10 Intentions for Parents of Highly Sensitive Children

1. Keep it simple

Children today have too many toys, too many activities and too little time for free play. Sch Simplifying family time ool and sports are more demanding than ever and the quiet down time that is essential to highly sensitive children is decreasing.

As you fill in your calendar or planner, take a good look at your days. Are you over scheduled? Where can you cut back? Actually block out some time on your calendar for “Free time,” or whatever you want to call it.

Basically a chunk of time on the weekend, week nights or after school when your children can have time at home to use their imagination, play outside, read, draw or whatever they want to do. If you can’t find a place to schedule this in, then it’s time to re-evaluate things. Your highly sensitive children will thank you for it!

2. Acceptance

There must be acceptance from parents before any progress can be made. As parents it is so important to accept your child’s high sensitivity. This is not something that will go away. It is a personality trait not a disorder, so trying to change him or her won’t work. Acceptance is the first step in communicating to your child that you are there for them and are going to be their advocate.

It is common for at least one parent or family member to have doubts about a child being highly sensitive due to denial, misunderstandings and/or the stigma associated with it. One of the most effective ways to decrease doubt and increase understanding is through accurate information, which can answer questions and ease concerns. Check out my Resources for Parents of Highly Sensitive Children for some great books and sites to get you started on educating others. My post, When Family Members Don’t Understand or Accept the Highly Sensitive Person, may be helpful as well.

3. Stop apologizing for your sensitive child

Apologizing communicates that you have something to be sorry for. It sends a message to your child that they are an embarrassment to you. If your child is acting in a way that is not socially acceptable or comfortable, try to understand that they are having a tough time and attempt to discover what is causing them to act this way. Your child is doing the best they can and so are you. Support them, don’t apologize.

4. Make yourself a priority

self care highly sensitive child When you take care of yourself, your children benefit. You’ve heard it a million times before, but it really is true.

I get that you don’t feel like you have the time. I know you could be doing a million other things on your to-do list instead, but I urge you to make it a priority in your life. Carve out at least 30 minutes for yourself and see how it feels. I guarantee you won’t regret it.

Being an advocate for a highly sensitive child can be very rewarding, but also overwhelming and draining at times. Make sure you take time for yourself and get the support you need so that you can be there for your child. Schedule a date night or have your husband put the kids to bed and escape to your favorite bookstore or coffee shop one night a week. Little breaks here and there will help you recharge and be better prepared to handle any challenges thrown your way.

5. Find your tribe

It is so refreshing to talk to other people who understand exactly what you are going through. You can ask questions and learn from the experiences of other parents who have been there before. It is not uncommon to feel isolated and misunderstood when caring for the needs of your highly sensitive child. Joining a community of like-minded parents can be so emotionally and socially fulfilling. You may even find that your past experiences can help others and you can pass on your knowledge too! I invite you to join our group on Facebook: Parents of Highly Sensitive Children.

6. Educate yourself and others

The more you understand about high sensitivity, the more you will be able to understand and help your child. educate yourself about high sensitivity Read books and blogs about highly sensitive children and share them with others. Have your spouse read them, your parents, your in-laws, etc. It is so important to educate yourself and anyone who interacts with your child regularly. If your child’s teacher is having trouble understanding your highly sensitive child (HSC), provide them with a few resources to educate them.

Get free access to my Highly Sensitive Child Resource Library that includes a high sensitivity cheat sheet that can be distributed to others.

FREE HIGHLY SENSITIVE CHILD RESOURCE LIBRARY

Get access to cheat sheets, checklists, and other valuable resources to help highly sensitive children when you sign up to receive my weekly newsletter

7. Focus on the positives

It is so easy to get wrapped up in all the things our highly sensitive children aren’t doing that we can miss the amazing things that they are accomplishing each day. HSCs are extraordinary people with so much to offer. Celebrate their achievements, no matter how small. It is important for your child’s self-esteem and confidence to know that you are proud of them and all their efforts. Get access to the Celebrating Sensitivity printable, listing 10 benefits of being highly sensitive, in the Resource Library above.

8. Practice patience

highly sensitive child practice patience Personally, this is my biggest intention for the new year. Raising a child who is overwhelmed by the world around them is often challenging and frustrating. What is supposed to be fun, can end up being difficult and stressful at times. It becomes easy to grow impatient with their unconventional behavior and demands. There are several sacrifices that need to be made as a parent to an HSC and it can be a lot to handle on top of everything else you are juggling.

I have found that when I am able to remain calm and patient for my child, we both benefit. While I know this very well, I still find it difficult to control my frustration at times. Patience is something that you have to work at just like all the other aspects of parenting.

9. Accept help

Asking for help and/or accepting help is hard for a lot of parents. It means admitting that you can’t handle it all; however in reality no one can. When someone asks how they can help don’t hesitate to tell them. This will take a few things off your plate and give you the time and energy to focus on what is most important.

10. Share your story

You are gaining a lot of experience and learning new things every day through raising a highly sensitive child. Sharing your experiences and knowledge can not only be therapeutic for yourself, but beneficial to others as well. We all have something to share from our experiences. Passing on your wisdom to others can help you turn your struggles into something positive and meaningful. You will also likely receive words of encouragement to strengthen your commitment to helping your sensitive child. Share your story with other parents in our community, Parents of Highly Sensitive Children.

What are your intentions for this year?

You now have 10 intentions to try out this year. Which ones will you choose? Which do you feel will be most beneficial to you? Do you have specific things I didn’t mention that you want to focus on this year? I’d love to hear what you will be working on in regards to parenting your HSC. Please leave a comment below, so other parents can benefit. Thanks!